I have been hesitant to blog. To write down all that I have been feeling and experiencing lately. I don't exactly know why. Maybe the fear that no one will read therefore no one cares. Or maybe trying to put down in words all that is swimming in my head is just too darn hard. I am pretty much an open book as you all already know, and being that vulnerable is weighing heavy on my already skinned heart.
Today is March 9th. One month from today will mark the one year anniversary of my brother's death. How could a year have gone by already? A whole year! And how to we come to grips with the fact that Martin is not coming back. Will our lives ever be without deep sadness, worry, fear, heavy hearts and craving? Why did things have to change? Why did this have to happen to our family? We lost a brother, a son, an uncle, a godfather, a grandson, a nephew, a cousin....a best friend.
I have been robbed. Amputated.
It is raining here. Wash it clean, Lord. Wash it away.......