Sunday, September 26, 2010

weepy is me

Boy have I been weepy lately. For about the past week I have weeped every day. I'm talking crocodile tears and deep breaths of pure sadness, fear and hurt.

Yesterday I was driving home by myself from the grocery store and started weeping. I was thinking about my brother mostly. I was going over in my head all the events in life I am going to miss not sharing with him. Him graduating high school and then choosing a college to attend. His first girlfriend. Tennis matches and spring break vacations. His first job. Meeting the girl of his dreams and help planning their wedding. Oh how I ache when I think about all that I am going to miss. I miss him.

And then, as I was driving and weeping, the most amazing thing happened. In between tears, I looked up at the sky to my left and there it was. The most beautiful and vivid rainbow I have ever seen. My heart was shaken! I knew at that very moment Martin was looking down on me, comforting me. He was with me, as he always is. In my heart.

I was also reminded of God's promise and love. He is such a good God! He will never forsake me. He will never give me more than I can handle. Martin is in good hands.


Susie said...

I just love God's ways of showing us everything will be ok.

Anonymous said...

As Susie said, I, too, love the way God speaks to us that He is in control. From the moment Martin went to be with Him, God has given me so many words of comfort and peace. Our God is soooo good. I am grateful for His faithfulness. My heart is still broken, and will be until I am with HIM, but His word is real and comforting. Thank you, Jessica. You are not afraid of the truth. You are a gift from God. I LOVE you, Mom

Free Gal said...

So glad you saw the rainbow. We too, always seem to be reminded when we have our lowest of low days. With my hubby deployed, I get sad driving around, and I always hear "Jesus take the wheel, take it from my hands, cause I can't do this on my own" and then I know it will all be ok. Thats happened twice when I have felt sad! We see rainbows too during those times when they are needed most. Glad it brought you some comfort. :)